Left Behind

Joe and his wife Carol are chatting over dinner. “Let’s say I die,” Carol proposes. “Would you remarry and let your new wife wear my jewelry?”

“I suppose I might,” Joe answers.

“Would you let her drive my car?”

“It's possible,” replies Joe.

“And my golf clubs,” Carol says. “Would you give them to her?”

“Definitely not,” Joe says.

“Why not?”

“Because she’s a lefty.”

Can You Hear Me Now?

Playing as a single, Charlie is stuck behind a group of slow golfers. He approaches them and hands one a card that reads, “I am a deaf mute. May I play through, please?”

The golfers shake their heads dismissively, and Charlie gets the message: No way, pal. You can wait like anyone else.

In the next fairway, one of the slowpokes is cracked on the elbow by a ball hit from the tee. The group looks back to see Charlie holding his driver in one hand. With the other, he's holding up four fingers.