As the fiercest golf rivals at Hummingbird Country Club, Pete and Devin didn’t trust each other a wit. During one especially heated match, Devin holed a short putt on the eighth green and marked a six for himself on the scorecard. He turned to Pete and asked, “What did you make there?”
Pete counted his strokes and said, “I had a six… No, wait – it was actually a five.”
Devin marked the card and said, “Eight.”
“What do you mean eight?” Pete asked with an insulted tone. “I had a five.”
“Well, let’s see,” Devin replied. “First you said six, then changed it to five, but I had you at seven.”
“OK,” said Pete, “so why did you give me an eight?”
“I added a one-stroke penalty for improving your lie.”
Heaven: Reachable in Two
Clarence teed up his ball on the first hole and promptly drove it into a stand of oak trees. When he arrived at the ball, he spotted a small opening between the trunks and decided it was worth the risk. Clarence took a full swing with his trusty 3-iron. The ball caught a tree squarely and ricocheted hard, hitting Clarence in the temple and killing him on the spot.
Club still in hand, Clarence approached the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter greeted him with a kindly smile. “Are you a good golfer?” St. Peter asked the new entrant.
“Well,” Clarence answered proudly, “I got here in two, didn’t I?”